The Summer

Hello All

This summer has proved an unusual and unexpected one.

Having moved house in January and learnt to drive, for various reasons I decided to take a back seat on the acting front for a few months. This enabled me to pursue more design and art work. The summer kicked off by designing and building posters, set puppets and props for the amazing River People(www.theriverpeople.co.uk) for thier new show and tour of 'Little Matter'. Suffice to say they were amazingly reviewed and were one of the most talked about and praised shows at the Edinburgh festival this year... well done chaps!

Following that I was employed to design and build a variety of puppets and props for the Illyria (www.illyria.uk.com) summer season this included masks, chicken puppets, an enormous digger and entire set for Roald Dahls ‘Fantastic Mr Fox’, and some props and set pieces for ‘The Pirates of Penzance’. Both were terrific shows (images to follow soon).

Next up was running the design side of a two week theatre skills course for young people at the Portsmouth New Theatre Royal. In two weeks a team of teenagers had to write, design, build and direct a show. And they did a terrific job. They used a specially designed mini theatre designed by the Salisbury playhouse.

Then I started work on Wizard Theatres (www.wizardtheatre.co.uk) puppet dragon for their upcoming tour of the reluctant dragon. Which is still in production (pictures to follow soon).

And I’ve topped off the summer with an acting gig, working with the fantastic creative cows, www.creativecow.co.uk playing a variety of roles including the Morrocan king Mullisheg in David Heywoods ‘Fair Maid of the West’. Which has been very well reviewed and continues running until September 10^th. Reviews and images on my website... www.cbarlow.co.uk.

I hope all your summers have been as productive as mine  :)

 

Peace and love

Chris

Treasure Island... new years and beyond.

Hello dear peruser of these words.

well, its already January the 2nd. Its the day after the last show of Treasure Island. When a show ends there is always a bag of mixed feelings, of both relief and sadness. a joy of being able to rest and recuperate, and emptiness of the lack of routine, the loss of performing, the goodbye to the cast and creative team... and even and sometimes particularly the goodbye to a character.

Its very easy to fall in love with a character, no matter who they are, when you play them every day. losing yourself in them, their habits, their personality, their effect on others around them, its a weird feeling putting to bed a character you have lived in for a while. its also that fact that your creative process is over. you never stop developing and tweaking a character with every performance. and when the show ends, thats your creative work done. its like finishing a painting. finishing it has a moment on joy, and then sadness creeps in because the fun is in the creation... its is this sadness that prompts you to do something else, a new creation.

right now i'm saying goodbye to treasure island.

I had a great time with Simon Mccoy as livesey and spinnacker, Eva Sampson as Benjamina Gunn / Barnical / Mrs Hawkins, Micheal Diana as Tom / Redruth / Hands, Leonie Elliot as Tempest (silvers Daughter, Damian Robinson as Billy Bones / Captain Smollet / O'Brien, and Robert Southworth as Jim Hawkins. goodbye to you and your characters. goodbye to Caroline Sharman the director.

Goodbye to the band: Igor Kennaway (MD), Alonso Mendoza (composer and percussionist), Simon Lambert (Piano)

Goodbye to the cast of fantastic kids who did so brilliantly in the show.

Good bye to the amazing set by Simon Higlet. and costumes by NaomI Gibbs

Not to mension Dom and jay the stage managers, and all the office staff front of house and theatre management at the New Theatre Royal portsmouth.

Its a big time for the theatre with a go ahead with a multi million pound rebuild... watch this space... its going to be a powerhouse of the arts in the south! thank goodness!

anyway goodbye treasure island. thanks to all those who came to see it.

next on the agenda is a set of personal projects i want to finish, including my kids book I'm illustrating.

so ta ta for now... I'm off to recuperate.

have fun.

Happy new year to all... and the best of luck with the year ahead.

Chris xx

Treasure Island - Capt'n Flint Parrots

Hello again dear readers,

So, treasure island!

Well I had finished making my/Long John Silvers wooden leg and now I needed to make the parrot.

My original idea for the Captain Flint parrot was a traditional rod puppet, the was sort of mangy, and featherless, with a big scar down its face. However, Caroline Sharman (the director) was concerned of the puppetry demands of such a puppet (and rightly so) with the adult actors having to play many characters, and the kids needed for many of the dances and simply my height at 6' 5'' meant that having a traditional rod puppet being operated by somebody else, was not going to be possible with this production. Simon Higlet the designer also wanted the parrot to be realistic looking.

So it was back to the drawing boards.

I thought about a self operated puppet that would be attached to me and I could operate from my pocket via the medium of cables and springs. This would have worked, but... for a lot of the time the parrot would look dead... it would also have limited movement. and look very fake and puppet like as a result, or simply like a stuffed dead parrot. It would also not be easily removed from me.

So I looked into Animatronics.  Animatronic kits for such a parrot cost a small fortune that would have taken almost the entire of the shows budget. I then remembered my days playing with furbys, and quickly started looking for animatronic toys.... and I discovered an amazing toy called Squwarkers Mccaw. these are full size parrots, that sit and move, talk and blink like real parrots, they react to touch, sound, voice and light and are totally self contained battery operated toys. Although new, fairly expensive... I thought a couple of second hand ebay ones would be perfect. and perfect they were.

These parrots were terrific. and not only did they look and move amazingly, they were hard wearing (being toys) and remote controlled and reprogram-able. so I could program the toy to say what i needed it to and it would respond to the appropriate line from the actor (this proved slightly unreliable in practice) but it was still a great solution to the self operated traditional rod puppet.

Once I had the toys I then set about recovering them. As lovely as they were, they needed to be less toy like a more real. so some paint work and varnish later they were 'realed' up as it were.

I then designed a way of getting the parrot to sit on my shoulder, then with the help of my dad and his awesome metal work machine we build a contraption for the parrot to sit on. We created a metal plate that had two spikes coming out it it these ran up into the feet of the parrot. there was also a metal strop that ran down my back with a bolt attached that again stuck out of the back of my costume. To the parrots themselves, we attached a metal strip that ran through its tail. This clipped effortlessly to the bolt on my back when the parrot was placed on my shoulder. This held the bird in place, but also meant it was quickly removable.

In practice this worked great when just walking about but when i had to do some intense moving around the demand was too great and the parrot would fall off or to the side. So we added a couple of ties that helped tie the parrots feet to the spikes and it stayed firmly put... chatting and chirping and looking very real!

The final hurdle i had to cross, was another parrot, that flew. So i returned to the idea of a traditional rod parrot. only this time it had one simple purpose and that was to fly. I had made Huge flying seagull puppets for James and the Giant Peach   so i adapted the flying wing contraption i had developed for those for a smaller more light weight parrot puppet. and again with the help of my dad and his awesome metal lathe we made the flying contraption which was sprung loaded with elastic bands. the effect - pull the rope - the wings flapped down. release it they sprung up. nice and fluid and realistically. Modeled below by Damian:

the body of the parrot i built out of styrofoam, and covered in fake fur that i painted to texture and match it to the animatronic parrots. the feet and eyes were super sculpey... and the beak painted and varnished card. it had to be light as it would be operated by kids... and  we had a flying captain flint.

operated below and in the show by Declan:

So with the parrots built and silvers leg... and later I made a palm tree for the set and a few other bits and bobs... it was time for me to pick up my script, throw on a tricorn and start rehearsals as Long john silver.

over and out.

xx

Treasure Island - Silvers Leg

Dear Readers,

It has been a busy busy few weeks. Treasure Island has been filling my life in many many ways... Late October I started having meetings with Caroline Sharman at the New Theatre Royal Portsmouth and a few emails with designer Simon Higlet and costumer Naomi Gibbs I started work on some puppets and props for the production. This included a wooden leg I would have to wear as Long John Silver.

Simon and I both agreed it should be a bit like an action man leg... pivoted in the middle. this would enable me to have some movement in the leg.

I made a basic structure for the leg out of a dense blue foam, a type of flexible styrofoam, the sort of stuff you would pad a seat out of.

the leg was in three parts the upper/thigh part, the lower leg/shin part, and the foot. it had to look like it was made from wood and look accurate when bent/pivoted.

 This is the leg partly painted. once i had constructed the shape of the leg, I heated a knife and sires to an extream heat and used (in a well ventilated space) the hot knife to carve into the plastic foam.

I took the opportunity with the leg to create something that wasn't just a wooden leg, but also had a story. i liked the idea of silver spending his spare moments at sea just whittling things into his wooden leg. so i drew up a design of an octopus reaching its arms around the leg and up towards a ship on the waves. i also carved certain character names into the leg. names of silver friend from the book, like flint, blind pew etc.

once i had carved this design i then needed to make the leg look wooden, so i did this by carving grain and slits through the leg and through the carvings. I also had to carve out the picot points to give the pivot illusion. then it was time to paint the leg. a couple of white undercoats, and then with the wood effect paint work.

The is the leg on. The lower part had a zip running up the back hidden under a material flap painted with the same wood effect. Once I had painted the leg  i used tin foil on the pivot joints to give them a metal look. i then varnished the leg several times to give it strength and also a nice wooden sheen. then i had to make the foot.

I used one of my old Crocs Boots, as a base, then stuck foam over it and carved into it. Using Evostick (i used a lot of this on the project) i stuck some foil to felt and cut out some metal bits to dress the wooden leg. in an attempt to make the leg and foot look functional and hard wearing.

with the foot done the last thing to do was age the leg. I worked from the foot upwards, give the foot especially as slightly old moldy look as if its gotten damp a lot, and traveled that up the leg. i rusted the metal parts, and adorned the leg with some leather strops and nail head to make it look like its bee repaired and held together.

this is the leg on:

now all i needed was the rest of the costume, a script and a parrot!

Parrots were my other obsession... check back for more updates on treasure island !

Chris xx

A bright new day!

Dear casual follower,
Last night i suggested going to the 9 am Harry Potter showing....

This was met with some interest but also concern from Colin... and a reluctant desire from Bernie (he's a closet Harry fan).

Colin, was worried that he might be wobbly and have a seizure whilst in the cinema.

Fair enough... i thought... he's been having a wobbly day and actually had two seizures today, so fair enough.

however, we always see the Harry Potter films together.... i know he really wants to see it. and i chose that showing because...its the first... its early in the morning... generally Colin doesn't start feeling wobbly until the evening (as i guess the meds start wearing off) , it wasn't busy (i had Checked) and we could all see it together as i will be working away a lot in the forthcoming weeks.

there was an understandable amount of doubt about a trip to the cinema being a good idea... so i thought... Big shame... but i understand.

Imagine the Joy then dear word reader, when this morning I received a knock on my bedroom door. it was 8.30. Bernie and Colin were up and we were going to see Harry Potter...

This was excellent news.

And well done to Bernie for his gentle pushing... and mostly well done to Colin for taking some steps forward. and getting out and about.

We went to see the film, and it all happened without incident. WOOTY TOOT TOOT

The film itself... i thought... was excellent.... really really well put together, and handled the story and its dark moments very well... also i'm so pleased they are doing ti as a double film, because even as film 1 and only half the book its still at times, felt slightly like there was too much story. But lovely work from all the actors, particularly liked Bill Nighy, and Alan Rickman did some cracking subtle acting, that should delight those who read the book.,,,

Anyway, the best thing is... Colin.

He Went, He saw, He concurred that it was a good film.

I am so so so so so so so so so so so so so so proud of him. After his seizures last night it was a clear, determined, and brave step to get out. and it was incident free, and i hope he reaps the benefits, not just that it was was good film, but, more i hope, its a step towards rebuilding confidence.

Chris xx

Sooooooo...Lets talk about CANCER! YAY!!.... Part 2

PART 2

Dear Peruser,

Let me give you some backwards glances into some of my previous experiences with disease...

My grandfather on my mothers side had suffered with cancer... but he had pulled through it... survived... and lived on... he eventually however suffered a stroke and died, just over a year after my mum died of cancer.

This take place between the ages of 10 and 12...

I lived with my mum. She was diagnosed with stomach cancer. After several aggressive surgery’s, a planet load of chemo therapy, and a PowerStation full of radio therapy , she eventually died within two years.

It was two years of agony for everyone.... god knows what she must have been going through in her head!

Two years of watching the most important person in your life go through pain, lose their hair, smell of chemicals, and ultimately die.

But!!! She NEVER stopped living. She got jobs, she cooked meals, she went out very often, wig on... and eventually giving up with them... wig off. She determinedly raised two children during that time. Apart from right near the end when after a holiday with our dad, my sister and I subtly didn’t go home, dad had taken over.

Even when she was most really quite ill and still in recovery from an operation, she would insist on answering the door...

I can still see her now hobbling across the room holding her tummy where the stitches / staples had been, from the op.

I even remember just days before she died, she was in a care home, and it was my sisters birthday, she barely made sense, and what she was saying was all jumbled up. Im not going to give details because what happened that day is deeply private to me. Suffice to say... she still managed to just about stagger through a very slow Happy birthday on the piano, in a way that made every note shake through me.

The point is...she lived... actually lived... right up to the last moments when, her body simply said no.... and she died.

The effect that had on me was... both devastating... but also enlightening.

As you can imagine, dear blog browser, that was my role model. That taught me that you have to work at life fearlessly and passionately because you don’t know what’s next for you. It’s led me to follow my heart so fiercely that it has at times caused great problems in my life.

But most importantly. You also realize that no matter what... there is always somebody worse off than you.

Also in the last year or so, I have had a cousin (29) killed by a bus. A childhood friend hung himself for being unhappy in himself. An older friend had a heart attack and died . A very wonderful teacher/boss/hero of mine died quite quickly of leukemia. An aunt died suddenly. And Last year I had quite a nasty cancer scare, and had to face that possibility.... it’s also a genetic risk in my family, and something that I am now being monitored on.... all of this has, of course, influenced my thoughts on death, my attitudes to life.

So what relevance does this have to my friend and house mate... Colin Buttermuff...well...

IT HAS LEFT ME IN A SITUATION...


Colin Is suffering.... Suffering badly....emotionally.

What’s making him immediately suffer is the epilepsy. This huge bastard thing that appears un-expectantly, embarrasses him, causes him extreme terror, anxiety, fear, tiredness, exhaustion and god knows what else.... but more importantly it’s a huge smack in the face reminder of his tumour.


A week ago, his family and I went out for dinner as a birthday celebration. Not long into the dinner, Colin had a seizure, a big one... the biggest in a long time.... (He is in the middle of a drug change, so the possibility of them happening was expected)... the surprise of the seizure, however, gave his Nan a bit of a funny turn.
The upshot is, he was devastated...felt terrible.... feels completely responsible... and has unshakingly remained so.

It’s been over a week. Colin has barely left the house. He sits in his room mostly. Getting him outside is an effort, and he does it with great reluctance. He is scared. Anxious.... and very depressed.

I love Colin very deeply. He is and has been one of the closest people to me for nearly 12 years. He knows more about me than any member of my family. And naturally, I hate seeing him like this.

I talked to him about how he was feeling... We talked at length.

I wanted to know what is going through his head... what is he basically feeling...

Essentially... He seems to have given up hope of living at all....


In fact he flat out refuses to engage with hope.

.... THERE IS NO HOPE INSIDE HIM....

Hope, to him, seems like he’s inevitably setting himself up to be disappointed, because he believes firmly that he will become a vegetable... and therefore, what is the point of living... what is the point of trying... what is the point of achieving anything in his life if that’s what’s going to happen to him... and it makes no difference if he has 5 years, 10 years, 50 years.... he is resigned that that is what is going to happen.

SO I talk to him... I try and encourage him to try living... to focus on the day in hand and to take it step by step.

He is refusing (at the moment) anti depressants... and although I completely agree it’s better for him to address and face the things making him sad and anxious... if he’s too depressed to do that... then what does that leave him. We also suspect that anxiety is often a trigger for his seizures.

I also have talked to him about trying to focus on the fact that he has no idea.... nobody has any idea... if what he fears (becoming mentally damaged) is even going to happen!


It is a likely hood... yes... but also between now and then there could be a great many years of living a perfectly normal life. (Once they find the right level of drugs for his epilepsy), there is also a very real chance he’ll live for a very long time and maybe even die of something else completely!

He has a brain tumour.... and now epilepsy.

Now, they haven’t yet cracked the meds with the epilepsy... they’ve been close but nothing has yet proved perfect... it has however only been about 6 months of trying... and as the doctor said, of the drugs he has tried, NONE of them have yet been tried properly, or in significant enough doses, and there are still other drugs out there / combinations... yet to try. However, Colin, I think, fears he might be one a very few whom they can’t treat perfectly...

However, he doesn’t have seizures every day, in fact there have been gaps of 3 or so weeks where he hasn’t had any really. A few tiny ghost ones here and there. But nothing significant. It’s during those times he starts to regain confidence. He starts to feel better about going out and about. Having a meal out.


But it takes just one to destroy all that work.... and at the moment he is very very very down.

NOW FOR THE SELFISH BIT.... CONCENTRATE...


The trouble I now have is two things:

1) I have all the time, sympathy, and understanding for him and his predicament... but I cannot pretend that deep down I dont feel a twinge of anger, and flash of annoyance....
He is a young man... and yes he has been dealt some bad news, and yes he has epilepsy. BUT! There are good things too.... right now he’s not a vegetable, right now is isn’t having seizures every day.... right now, they are trying to medicate the epilepsy, and its nearly there, give it a bit more time.... Right now he has have every opportunity to live a full life for potentially years and years to come.

I even find myself at times wanting to slap him and say... ‘GET A FERGY TOOTLING GRIP YOU SILLY ARSE!! THERE ARE PEOPLE WORSE OFF THAN YOU!’

I want to drag him around cancer wards, and show him children fighting off lukeamia.
I want to him to meet somebody with a high level glioma that’s been given two weeks to live.
I FURIOUSLY want him to just appreciate the sodding life he DOES have and WILL have for the foreseeable future and not fugging waste it sat moping in his room.

I want him to realise that with this bad news comes the opportunity to face your mortality and make the most of your life... to make a difference in the world however small or great, and don’t waste the few good things you have been given.

I want him to consider that, the truth is anyone could have a brain tumour.... there is no public testing system... and anyone could find out when it’s too late. Any of us, could have one and we won’t know until we have developed epilepsy. And that the only difference between now and March this year is that he knows about it.... he’s had it for 10 years.... but only now does he know about it... and it that knowledge that’s making him choose to give up...

I want him to realise - what’s the point of giving up today because he’s going to be giving up for many many many years... why not wait until he’s really in the muck...and then consider giving up... that would be a start....

I want him to see that people much worse off than him (LIKE MY MUM FOR EXAMPLE) had more determination, and zest to fight and live...

I want him to accept that unlike my cousin (same age) who had his life taken from him devastating his family... Colin has the opportunity to look ahead and make the most of now.

.....but the thing that makes me cross the most is..... I WANT HIM TO REMEMBER THAT HE IS STRONGER THAN THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All the things I have written there probably make me sound angry, selfish and that I have totally misunderstood what Colin is going through. And yes I can see that.

But dear reader, please believe me, I haven’t.


What I am doing is being honest. The whole point of writing this is, I guess, is a chance for me to be honest. These are things I haven’t said to him... and probably won’t.


But they are things that have at times flashed through my head... feelings I have that just simmer deep inside. And although they may sound harsh, I think there is some justification, and reasons there that I feel them. They are not coming from a bad place... they are coming from a place desperate for Colin to find a way of living again.

2) My other problem is... I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt at the moment. I don’t know how to conduct my life.... I like to get up and go out, I’m fierce with my career, I spend nearly every waking hour doing something, be it painting, puppet making, writing, job hunting, working... ANYTHING... just doing something productive.

In a way I am the opposite of Colin. I am so so terrified of dying young, from seeing my mum die young, my family dying off, having a scare with cancer... having to be watched because I’m a high risk of getting it. I am SCARED TO DEATH!!!! Of dying young....

But the consequence of that is I want to achieve EVERYTHING NOW! I’m 27 and I’m pissed off I’m not at the top of my career.... I want to publish a book, I want to illustrate kids books, I want to tour more, I want to make films, I want to write and produce my comedy series, I want to fall in love... and I want ...no... I feel, I desperately need to do it now! Just in case I die tomorrow.

More importantly...

I want to touch peoples lives. If I was to die tomorrow, I want people to be at my funeral thinking, what a shame, he brought something good to my life...

I want to leave a positive mark on the world in some way.... it’s an almost feverish desire.

I guess, therefore, it my desire to live, that’s at odds with Colins desire to give up...
But also, I feel terrible for going out, and trying to do these very things.

I simply feel bad about doing things, and him not coming.... or him sat at home being sad...

But what can you do? If I stay at home all day everyday, I’ll not be a good influence on him eventually. But then not being here, I guess I’m not being supportive...

It’s left me. Unsure of myself.

This has taken me a long time to write, so I’m going to wrap it up now... as I don’t need to reach a conclusion, and the point of this is to discuss view and develop my thinking, over time and into the future.

However, I will finish by saying this.

Right now I’m at a loss.

I don’t know what to do.

I want to help Colin.... and I want to help him be happy. But he is very depressed.... and to be honest... fair enough... he has every right to be and every reason to be... but I want to help him live.

And the thing that upsets me most is this..

No matter how much support... no matter how well he does.... no matter how much we can help, and no matter how much improvement he makes.... just when we think we see glimmers of hope and happiness..
Colin is hit with a seizure like the one he just had... and then follows the tears.... and then follows the unravelling of all the good work he had achieved.... and to be completely honest.... I’m not surprised... the seizures are bloody horrible for him to go through... and it’s heart breaking and sickening to see the emotional and physical devastation they leave him with. They seem to be a force that neither he nor us can compete with.... and they seem to be winning.

And when I see them...

... I’m sat feeling... hopeless... like a useless friend.

Chris xx

Sooooo... let's talk about CANCER! YAY! .... part one!

Dear Reader,

I want to talk about cancer.

There, I said it... I didn’t think I was going to.

I almost didn’t say it because, I’m unsure of the reason of why I’m blogging about it. It’s a mix of feelings. A need for support. A need to feel united with somebody.... anybody... who relates. An opportunity for others to find support. I also feel guilt, selfishness and betrayal for writing about it.


But I assure you... and probably myself... that it’s just something I feel like I need to do. A way to put in front of me things and feelings and thoughts, in a format I don’t want to feel like I’m on my own with. A way of viewing openly and honestly what’s going through my head.

Not every post will be about this... but this may be a theme from now on.

5 Minutes ago I just watched my best friend and house mate, have a seizure. As seizures go, it was a full seizure, with all the normal shaking, noises, flatulence and such that go with it.

If you are lucky enough to have never seen somebody seizure, then all I can say is, it does an odd little trick in your head. The first time you see a seizure it can stay with you a while. It’s not shock as such...well yes it is...but more it’s some deep down need to want to help a fellow human, but a total feeling of uselessness and hopelessness washes through you, that stays with you and kind of makes you feel... a bit surplus.

Oddly from then on you can see many many seizures, and deal with them just fine. It’s always the first one that gets you.... I do believe however, it’s a good and healthy thing to see, because it makes you learn about them, what to do about them, and future proofs you against them... as it were.


Anyway I digress.


Back to my best friend and house mate, from here on, I shall call him.... Colin Buttermuff.... because that’s not his name.

Colin Buttermuff has just had a seizure.
Colin Buttermuff then cried for a long time.
Colin Buttermuff has a brain tumor.


A BRIEF BACKGROUND 

April 2010. Colin Buttermuff and the rest of us. (His Partner “Bernie Futtersnack”, Brother “Gorilla Spactula” and Girlfriend “Mctippy Heals”, younger brother “Pancake Spactula”, mother “Splenda Magenta Dufflehat”, and myself “ Chris ‘I’m on a diet which gives me the god given right to secretly eat your cake’ Barlow”) . All went on a camping (not in the gay way... although gays were present) holiday in Glastonbury.


Colin, Bernie and I went early. Erected some tents (not in the gay way) and out of the blue, Colin had an unexpected seizure, and most of the holiday involved waiting around a hospital awaiting results... that and Bernie unnecessarily killing a spider (I find that sort of thing hard to forgive... tut tut Bernie... tut tut.)

THE RESULTS?...... NOT GOOD!

Colin was diagnosed with a low level Glioma.... of the Astrocytomas variety.

In layman’s terms:

Roughly, that’s a very slow growing Brian Tumour made of brain matter. That grows in small firework/star like shapes.

Or for the total thickies like me:

He got stars in his head.

Now, tumours like this are apparently very VERY slow growing.... as in, they think (by they, I mean the qualified lot that always seem to want you to take your clothes off so they can have a feel. That, and, save your life) Colin may well have had this Glioma for around 10 years, if not longer, and in all that growing time it’s had no impact on how he lives, until now.

The result of which is, it’s been discovered late. Too late to operate. But this also can mean he could very well live a long and fulfilling life.


Then again, maybe not so long.... but, at the moment, it’s all very slow... with possibilities to manage it. :-S
Oh yeah... and it’s given him fecking horrid epilepsy.

The long and the short of it is.............

NOBODY UNDERSTANDS WHAT THE HOT FIERY HELL IS GOING ON!!

The truth is... there are treatments out there... there is research out there.... but they don’t really understand brain tumours. They can be very very slow growing and nothing happens for years and years and years.
Then sometimes they can suddenly speed up and change... for no reason. They can start to heal... for no reason.... they can cause epilepsy... and they don’t know why!!!


SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN????!!!

This means that poor sods like Colin have to cope with this massive thwack of news, with no certainties, with epilepsy, a huge impact on there lives.... and simply not know what’s in store...

Basically... Colin is no different now, from how he was in January. When he was fine and healthy but still had the tumour. He just didn’t know about it. There was no epilepsy yet. He is perfectly healthy in many ways. The tumor itself is doing very little.... and growing so slowly that it is likely to do very little for a very long time.

It’s a good possibility that he could out live the rest of us, and have a better quality of life than the rest of us.

The fact that the tumour has caused Epilepsy is ‘sort of’ a side issue. It’s been caused by the brain tumour, but in essence, they are separate entities.

This means, with the right types and levels of epileptic drugs. They could manage the seizures. And Colin might live like every other healthy person for years and years and years. He could outlive us all!

There is, however, a few small problems there.... The words ‘Might’, ‘Could’, ‘Possibly’.

There are chances of very different outcomes.

IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS DEEP FAT FRIED AND DRIPPING IN CHOCOLATE - HOW DOES A PERSON DEAL WITH THIS???!!!
 
How do you deal with something so huge and dramatic and life changing and horrid and terrifying... and yet ... maybe not?

And this is ultimately why I am writing this blog.

I guess I feel stupid, helpless, selfish.


Lost, confused, hopefully, cynical.


Because as a bystander, I don’t.... know.... what...to.... do....

It was an unfortunate timing that we received this news just before I had to leave on a tour. I felt like a total git for leaving for 5 months at such a time.... however, the contract was signed... there was no other work... Colin wanted me to go... and in truth, by being at home I could be supportive... but physically I could change nothing.


So I went... and obviously, stayed in touch and up to date.

I have now been back home for just under two months.


What I want to talk about is support and management of how people feel.

In the time I have been home I have seen Colin Buttermuff go from happy as Larry, pottering about, getting out and about, to wailing and crying, refusing to leave the house and simply living in abject terror and pain.

So daily ,As a bystander, who loves him, my question to myself is...

WHAT CAN I DO?!

Thus endeth part one....
xx

Serious Stuff?

You know,

I think one of the reasons I am dreadful at updating this blog is because I try and keep it cheerful and frivolous.... or educational.

Now, I have been working on many projects of late, but many I can’t share with you because of copy write reasons or because they are private projects I want to keep under wraps until I have them finished.

So I ask myself, what do I write about. What should I discuss... and why would anybody want to read it.

Well as I said, my problem is that I try and keep this blog light and fluffy and straightforward. Everything life never is.

And that’s my problem. I’ve always been at my best when talking about real things. And so dear reader, I am going to bump this blog up into the realms of real life and talk about some serious stuff.

This is a warning....

The next post is the serious stuff.

Love
Chris x

Oh Dear!!!

Oh dear oh dear oh dear.

I hang my head in shame. I flagellate myself. I prostrate myself before you.... I haven’t updated my blog in a year!!! Huge massive gulps of sorryness emanate from my belching bum.

Well I shall try and be a better from now on. At least a bit.
So what can I say...what do I have to share with you the world out there. There is so much I almost don’t want to begin.

I am in the last couple of days of a large uk tour of James and the Giant Peach with Illyria (www.illyria.uk.com) . It’s been a fantastic show that’s sold out all over the place and had some fantastic reviews. I’ve really enjoyed playing a blind grumpy earthworm. It’s been lovely playing a character that conflicts with every other character. Although navigating myself around a stage with a huge hole in the centre with dark glasses on, trying not to look, in the dark, has been somewhat challenging. However, with three shows left to go so far I’m the only cast member who hasn’t fallen into the hole! So touch wood that it remains that way.

We have taken the show to every nook and cranny of England, Wales, Scotland, Guernsey and even the Netherlands. We’ve covered some 24000 miles, and slept in so many Travelodge’s I’ve stopped being able to tell what day is what or where we are.

Also since my last update I got work with the New Theatre Royal Portsmouth on their first in house production in 50 years. The production was Alice in Wonderland and the parts I was playing were the Caterpillar, the gryphon and the king of hearts. Suffice to say it was a great show and I had a fantastic time. It’s so good to see a new producing theatre in the south...helmed by the lovely Caroline Sharman.
Talking of the new theatre royal...

I shall be working there again this Xmas playing long John Silver in Treasure Island. You should come and see the show... the theatre needs our support as its fundraising so they can rebuild the stage. This beautiful theatre deserves the rebuild. So please please come!

Other stuff that’s been going through my mind.

Enchanted truth: those who have seen my comedy sketches on Youtube...well I’m developing them into a new a bigger project... ill keep this updated with the status of that.

Good year for films...

This has been a great film year...some highlights for me have been, Sherlock Holmes, Avatar, Scott pilgrim, toy story 3... they all deserve a watch.

Looking forward to the final harry potters.

Right I shall over and out for now, but I shall be better at updating from now on.

Love and peace
Chris xx

November again!!! WTF!

Greetings all

It’s been a while since my last update. Much has been happening.

Life for me has been good if a little tight in the budgetary department. I was denied credit on a tv and ps3 bundle deal....heartbroken....devastated...like moth crushed on the wheel of and angry bullied tricycle.
I have had luck with love....a rarity for me!....which has been lovely and going well so far so hurrah!!!

Weight loss has been a bit rubbish...I’ve been working out in the gym a lot!! It seems to have improved my health but made no difference to my body Shape or weight....also i’m finding very hard to say no to the cake at this point in my life. However, it’s important to remain positive... a fluctuating 17 ish stone is much better than a fluctuating 26 ish stone, for this 6’ 5’’ goliath.

I also won a laptop from HP...It’s a funky artist’s edition one....I won it for a little video I made for a competition they ran you can view it here (click).

As for work, I am very excited as rehearsals are nearing for Alice in Wonderland (New Theatre Royal Portsmouth) would love to see you there. I am playing the caterpillar, the king of hearts and the gryphon as well as i imaging some other smaller parts here and there. I have the script and rehearsal cds, so work for me has started already. But we don’t officially start for another week yet, however when we do start I shall blog regularly with its progress.

I am working on a new project, one that is based on an old project. I wrote a series of monologues some of which are on youtube, called Enchanted Truths....i had a brainwave and have been working it through with my very good and talented friend ben (www.benfrancis.com ), and looking at reworking these monologues into something new. Its very exciting and i shall update in the future when they are further in development.

Other than that my chickpeas things are good even if the economy isn’t. So woofta tits hurrah!!

Take care folks,

Love and hugs,

Chris xx

HP Competition

Please Please Please Please, vote for me in this video competition.

Its with HP and I had to make a video about a couple of aspects about myself but not show my face. there were strong limitations on what could be used....hense no music.

Please vote for me by giving stars and comments.

thank you so much.
i shall repay you with metaphorical cheese.

Much love
Chris XX

My Harry Potter Review!!

Hello!

So...ok....On Wednesday night this week I went to see Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.
And this is my Review.

*loads of spoilers so be warned*

First of all I am confused about the rating of the film because I have read elsewhere that it was given a PG rating. When I saw it, it was given a 12A. Anyone know why? Are they different ways of saying the same thing?

Second of all I just want to say that I think since Order of the Phoenix.... LUNA LOVEGOOD has stolen the films for me. She is wonderful, and seems to innocently and gently steal any scene she glides through. I want her to have her own film and series of books.

Anyway... the film overall. Rub your bums this might be a long one.

The mood, as is the fashion with the harry potter films, is indeed ‘darker’ that before...however, it is also funnier. I suppose a good way of describing the atmosphere of the film is sombre. It has moments of excitement, moments of great humour and moments of great sadness, but overall there is something sombre running underneath. A sort of feeling of despair. And I liked it for that.

Perhaps this is because there aren’t any moments of great triumph, no big trio win the day moments, no house points, or Halloween celebrations. Just Harry’s story. And it really is Harry’s story, as many of the other players have just blink and you’ll miss them moments. But this is to be expected when cutting down a book as big as the Half Blood Prince.

Over all, I really enjoyed the film. But there is still a small feeling left with me, that it wasn’t quite adequate enough. There is something about the film that is not quite fulfilling, and it’s taken me a couple of days to really think about what it is...and I think I have worked out.
To me it didn’t quite feel like we were given enough of anybodies story. The Half Blood Prince is complex in that there are numerous important plots that play out. There is Harry’s story...his lessons with Dumbledore, his relationship with Ginny, his task with Slughorn, and his obsession with the Half blood prince. That’s four quite major story lines just for Harry to cram in. Then of course we have Snapes tale...now defence against the dark arts teacher, the unbreakable vow, his need to help Malfoy, his difficulties with Dumbledore. Then of course there is Malfoy’s story of desperately trying to achieve the dark lords task, avoiding Snape, his face off with Dumbledore, his feelings over what has happened to his father. Then there is Slughorn the new teacher and his history and purpose....oh and of course there is Ron and Hermione to get in there as well. That is a lot to fit into a film even if it is 2 1/2hours long. And as such I don’t feel like as an audience we were really shown much of a journey for anybody. More sort of quick overviews. More of this in a minute.

Harry has his lessons with Dumbledore. And personally I think Gambon nails the part of Dumbledore this time. He managed to marry the darkness and urgency with great humour and eccentricities. But I also consistently believed he truly was a great wizard of immense power and knowledge. I really thought he was wonderful, and it made his death all the more painful. In fact, I thought that particular scene was played with incredible grace by all actors involved and Gambons ‘Severus, Please’ was perfect, emotional but ambiguous.

The acting praise doesn’t stop with Gambon. I think all of the cast upped their game in this film. Hermione seemed believably heartbroken, and her small scene when she tells Harry he’s her best friend and she wants to know how he feels about seeing Ginny with another, was a really lovely scene that portrayed the depth of their friendship beautifully. It made me look forward to the moment of Ron’s return in the seventh book. Because it’s nice to see just how deep and important the trio’s friendship is. Ron and Hermione, more than anyone, are Harry’s family, and it’s nice to have a director show how emotionally raw that can be sometimes.

Radcliffe is good as Harry, mature and relaxed in this film, and his Felix scenes are both inspired and beautifully played. Grint is funny as ever, and his relationship with lavender is well handled. However, I felt there wasn’t the emotional connection between Harry and Ron as there was with Harry and Hermione. Except perhaps when Ron is on the love potion and jumps onto Harry’s bed love sick and dopey, looking to his best friend for help.

Rickman is wonderful as Snape... less intense than he is portrayed in the book, but his good/evil ambiguity is still nicely handled. Although he doesn’t shout ‘Don’t Call me coward’ which I was looking forward to because Rickman really does shout venom well.

And of course the brilliant Jim Broadbent. Not looking quite how I envisaged Slughorn in the book, but he brings such a quirkiness and believability to him that he is a joy to watch. He wasn’t how I expected him to be...or even wanted him to be....in many ways he was better. He had a lovely eye tick that looked a bit like he had winked at so many people it had become a physical habit. Brilliant.

So...why with all this good acting did if feel somewhat lacking. Well. There wasn’t quite enough pain for me. There wasn’t quite enough trails, or difficulty. I felt Malfoy was having the hardest time, really caught in a horrible position, and really struggling with it, but there wasn’t quite enough of him for it to matter enough. And the same goes for Harry and Dumbledore’s journey. We miss some of the memories I really wanted to see and also some important information.
We find out the essential... what is a Horcrux. And that Tom Riddle was a manipulative little boy. We don’t however come to the realization that he liked to collect things...like a magpie. He liked trophies....that’s quite important info what you’re Harry on a mission to destroy them. And by not finding them out we don’t have the Hepzibah memory, with the locket! (We don’t even know why it’s a locket at all when they get it!) We don’t have the examples of Tom Killing for the first time and tearing his soul apart. So we have no back story of Voldemorts journey. There is not creation of Voldemort, just what he was like as a kid. No scene of him coming back to Hogwarts asking for a job, not sign of the tiara anywhere, no Morfin memory.

Basically, we don’t see how the boy riddle became the man Voldemort....which I thought was frankly one of the most exciting parts of the book. As a consequence we don’t know what sort of Horcruxes Harry needs to looks for. What is the ring? What is the locket? Where did he get it? None of this is answered or even adhered to...How will that effect the storytelling of the final book.

So I found that unfulfilling.

Dumbledore and Harry’s journey into the cave showed off some wonderful effects, there was no climbing down the cliff, no swimming to the rock (although even in the book I thought ‘they are wizards...why are they swimming?’) no brooms used to get back to the castle. I know its nit picking and doesn’t really offer anything in terms of story, but what these things did offer was a sense of adventure. The sense of Dumbledore having to rely on Harry... and that wasn’t all that clear. It is also a good example of just how determined and adventurous Dumbledore is for an old man.

However I have to say the Ring of fire / Dumbledore become Moses moment was breathtakingly exciting and really really really awesome effects.

So yes, I found the adventurous moments a little unfulfilling, as was the whole riddle to Voldemort story. But also I found the half blood prince story unfulfilling. In fact to me it almost felt like they quickly had to jam it in when they could. And I wandered if it hadn’t been called the half blood prince, if they would have cut it entirely. Harry’s obsession with the book comes across and a slight interest. There just isn’t time to show Harry reading a book and discussing the handwriting...but as such that storyline suffers hugely. And it did kind of make me think...if I hadn’t read the books, when Snape says ‘ I am the half blood prince’, I might have gone...’So what?’.

So again that, for me, was not fulfilling.

Also I thought it was a strange choice to have harry (a) not under the invisibility cloak and (b) not frozen. In the Dumbledore death scene. By not doing either of these things it changes Harry’s character. It makes him less reckless, less hot headed, less brave in some ways, more obedient but even more importantly it has given him a new grief complex!!! He even said in the following scenes that he did nothing. So he now regrets and blames himself for Dumbledore’s death? This is strange because it’s just not the case in the book, he tried to do something but was glued to the spot and the minute he was free he was after Snape! All thoughts of self preservation out of the window. It seemed to be an unnecessary change for aesthetics sake, but for me has quite severe character repercussions for Harry.

I wanted to see the Funeral...but I also didn’t miss it that much. They did show Fawkes leaving which was nice. I also wish Ron had spoken in that last chat the trio had.

What I did like a lot aside from the acting was seeing Snape’s house. The humour. Lavender. Helena Bonham carter. Mrs Malfoy and the unbreakable vow scene. I actually liked the handling of Harry and Ginny’s relationship. It felt right for the film. And I also liked the slightly suggestive moments. Anybody else smirk when Ginny did up Harry’s shoe lace? I also liked Ron’s slightly mishandled physical contact with Harry...Like the look at my chaffing lips, and the jumping onto the bed with him. Just subtle examples of friends finding their physical barriers with each other which I think is very typical with boys.

Luna turning up for the party (I was one of the many audience members who went ‘Awwwww’).
Snape being thrown up upon. The attention to detail.... like the Weasleys shop! And Mr. Weasley’s shed! I quite liked the attack on the burrow because it helped keep the feeling of danger being very close to harry. Katie bells curse was suitably scary. The Sectumsemptra (spell?) scene was good...although I wanted it to be a bit more shocking.

The Amazing and full score! Really lovely music. The cinematography and style of film is really beautiful. Some lovely framed shots. The Snape silhouette as the sky grew dark sticks in my mind as one small example of a lovely shot. Some really well done effects. A lovely foggy looking Hogwarts. And again I have to say it...Luna ‘That’s why I don’t wear shoes to bed’... (Because we were all wondering) Lovegood.

I would give this film almost four out of five stars. Well....er....yes ok four out of five stars.... but only just!

Sorry it was so long I just had a lot to say about it!!

Chris xx

Entertainment Recently

Hello Hello

Just thought I would write an entry about entertainment I have enjoyed over the last couple of months, because I feel it has been a particularly interesting few weeks.

TELEVISION

Generally I don’t watch TV, unless there is something specific like a period drama that I have been waiting to see. There is just so much cheap crap. People buying houses, people buying houses abroad, people talking about building houses, people cleaning houses, people decorating houses, people doing gardens and people going for walks in the country side. Then there are Chavs screaming at mothers, mothers screaming at Chavs, television presenters playing physiologists screaming at Chavy mother and at some point everybody slept with each other and apparently they are all related....and of course there is big brother.

That’s British tv for you.

But I must say there have been a few things that have grabbed my attention.

Freefall – a drama sort of about the recession. Gritty, hand held camera style. With some of the best naturalistic and believable acting I have seen for ages....good stuff.

Pushing Daisies – American, Fantastical over the top romance of the un-dead kind, nice mystery plot lines with a cracking cast and some beautiful surreal moments. The musical parts are my favourite. And some really touching times when the love interests express their love by not touching.

LOST – the recent series of lost was I thought simply superb. It raced along, there was little flab or filler. The acting was excellent, and the twists and turns mind blowing. Many questions were answered and you weren’t let guessing too long which kept it fun. But retained enough mystery to really stay tense....and the last episode and the cliff hanger were breath taking....i have a theory and it involves Jacob being a sort of god (one that maybe represents science) and another guy (dressed in black) being the smoke monster sort of representing faith. But that’s all for another post...however ...good stuff.

Family Guy and American Dad – still funny. Still shocking. I think they are a little formulaic now, but there is still so much fun to be had with them.
I have been revisiting some older TV comedy – Spaced – It is one of the best comedy series written for TV in my opinion. Why there can’t be more things like it I don’t know. But it’s still fresh. It’s still funny. But mostly for all its overblown style and cinematic language it still touching and it still feels real. Real in terms of character relationships and relate -ability to its audience.

THEATRE

I have enjoyed a couple of trips to the theatre recently.

I was fortunate enough to catch Illyria’s open air tours of The Three Musketeers and A Midsummer Night’s Dream. Both are stunning shows and are lovingly crafted with much energy, creativity and humour. They are touring the country all summer along with The Mowgli Stories.

The Winchester Hat fair was in town. So called because it’s a festival of street theatre, and traditionally buskers would lay out their hats for money. Of course many people now just turn up in silly hats. And there is nothing wrong with that. Some lovely acts. Beautiful puppet dragons, a brilliant painter who does a large portrait upside down and you can only tell what it is when he spins it around!

Next week I am off to see Lords and Ladies (a Terry Pratchett play on tour) and off into London to catch my idol Sir Ian Mckellen in ‘Waiting for Godot’.

FILMS

Star Trek – So much fun. JJ Abrhams really did himself proud I thought. Nice part of the story to tell. I loved how they reinvented it but kept it within cannon. Nice fresh cast, lots of new faces, sexy funny and exciting. And genuinely emotional at times. Great effects. A really good summer blockbuster.

Valkyrie – Hmmmm. It’s ok. Some nice moments. Some exciting bits. But why these Nazis were portrayed as so good they were frankly Jesus...I don’t know. Yes they tried to kill Hitler...but they were still Nazis! Confusing mix of accents as well considering they were all meant to be German. Ok so they speak English, and most of the cast had English accents, but then there were some American ones.... and Hitler actually has a German accent...I mean...Eh?! It’s like ‘Allo Allo’ on a big budget.

Bruno – One of the funniest films I have seen in ages. Some staged parts but the non staged parts are frankly knuckle scrappingly awkward, and seriously, Sacha Baron Cohen is fearless!!!!

Blood the Last Vampire – based on the manga film. Disapointing, and some terrible effects.

Confessions of a shopaholic – No! Just no.

Coraline in 3d – The new model animation from the Nightmare before Christmas creators. Felt a little long (but I may have just been tired) and quite scary for very little kids...but really staggeringly beautiful. The animation and characters are out of this world stunning.

Bolt in 3d – doesn’t have the depth or richness of character the pixar Disney films have, but it still pulls the odd tear out of the eye, and has some lovely animated moments, enjoyable.

Transformers 2 - Amazing effects, some sad moments, and some funny moments. really exciting. fan pleasing. yes the script is at times cheese and a bit too smart for its own good. But its transformers!! and they kicked arse!!!

HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE – I’ll do a bigger review I think because I really liked it and feel like I need to discuss it...being the Harry Potter fan that I am. But I say oh yes!

Other things

I am off to see the Banksie exebition in Bristol tomorrow, looking forward to that. I'm also hoping to catch Sister Act in the West End, when money permits of course.

Take Care All

Bye Bye for now

Chris xx

busy busy busy

Hello all!!!

In the news today....

So... the last few weeks for me have a slightly dull feeling and yet, I seem to be so busy my feet barely touch the ground.

Today has lovely weather but it was slightly ruined for me by having to do some flyering. Dear Jeebus! It can be such a demeaning thing to do. I’m sure it must create deep psychological scars. I mean I can barely look at paper now!

I have flyered a lot before, for many a show or event and it can be ok. Sometimes the street vibe is good. Sometimes you’re hidden in costume! Or simply the production is great so you sell it because you believe in it. But to try and sell a BBQ that although nice, many would think ‘SEVEN COCKING QUID for a burger!!!!’ was painfully hard. I received many a filthy look, rude gesture, grumble and some downright outrage at my little leaflet. So I packed it in and came home :)

However, this morning I had the delight to serve Jenny Eclair her breakfast! She was very nice (as was Susie Blake) and she likes her bacon extra crispy, and I damn well think she’s right.

The weighting room....

I have been doing what some beefcakes call pumping iron. However, I think I’m going to call it pumping large grey plastic discs full of sand, strapped precariously to a long steel bar. Over the last year I have gone from 26 stone to 17.5 stone in weight (that’s a 56’’ waist to a 39’’ waist). And it’s very nice, but I have reached that bloody hard bit where I just can’t quite reach my goal. So I am hoping some weights will help and so far so good. It’s certainly helping to tone the old chest and arms.

What concerns me is the problem with baggy skin. The same sort of thing women often have after pregnancy. Which almost re-tightens but doesn’t quite. My worry is that I was so fat for so long it may not re-tighten. Tummy tucks and such are very very very expensive, and to get one on the NHS or even assistance from them means you have to let your skin fester, rot and die before they even think of helping you. So I am trying to tone up, using a bit of massage and regularly applying Palmer’s Cocoa Butter Firming lotion. It’s meant to take six weeks to work...week 2 and yes some improvements. If it fails then I just need to hope for a well paid job to come my way.

Work Work Work....

I was offered a stunning tour of the ‘The Mowgli Stories’ with Illyria (www.illyria.uk.com) playing Baloo. I was very very excited by it, but recently, I have been fortunate enough to be getting interest from some very big casting people, and films etc. So I took a business risk and turned down the tour, to be available for a while to see what else I could net. Of course the minute I did, the auditions dried up and instead I am serving Jenny Eclair crispy bacon for breakfast.
As much as I regret this decision I do still believe that in any business you have to take risks every now and then. I just hope something trundles my way over the next few months.

BUT!!! All is not completely hopeless! It’s important to remain creative and I have been doing just that!

I have been quite busy on a variety of things. I have had a few little art commissions, a drawing, a painting and a couple of little sculptures. So they have been nice to be getting on with. But as ever they are for friends of friends etc, so I keep under charging for them by a huge amount, or doing it for free...still I love doing it though.

My new web page is proving a lovely tool (www.cbarlow.co.uk) built by my very good and very talented friend Ben Francis (www.benfrancis.com) . I will be uploading some of the art work I have been recently working on to the site soon so what this space.

I also had some cool business cards made up. I have never had business cards before but I thought it was about time I got a few. But I didn’t want just dull boring ones, oh no. I wanted something interesting, a little different. Something that showed off my talents as an actor, but also an artist and writer...something that captures personality as well as contact details, but also matches my web site! Then I found www.moo.com ! They are great because they print each card separately. So effectively the front of all the cards can be different.

I decided to put one of my poems with a little illustration on the front of the cards, so each card has a different tale and picture, with my details on the back! See below.



I love them you should check out moo.com if you are looking for thing like business cards and printing.
"The purpose of learning is growth, and our minds, unlike our bodies, can continue growing as we continue to live." - - - Morris Adler

I am currently trying to put my art work to a good use by struggling to learn animation. Specifically Flash animation at the moment. I have found Flash to be a really amazing tool and although at first it completely baffled me, it have picked up the basics in just a couple of hours. The whole program just makes sense, and the more you work with it the quicker and easier it becomes.

I have two reasons really for learning this, one: because maybe I could put my artwork to a more useful...er...use! And do some web flash banners and designs...It’s something that I could do on the road and might help just pay my bills a little. You never know.

But the main reason for learning is because I have written a few short movie ideas that will, one way or another, involve animation. And I hope to be able to produce the effects I want in the near future. (I’ll update on the progress of this later)
If music be the food of love....then great, but I’m actually starving and off for a burger....

Developed an awesome recipe for a vegetarian six bean chilli....really really nice...really filling and unbelievably healthy, doesn’t cost much either....if anyone fancies the recipe, email me and I shall send it to you.

Right then, you gorgeous lovely people. Take the very best care and I shall speak to you all soon.

Love and hugs

Chris Xx

Ps – Star Trek movie....oh dear god yes!!!

PPS – transformers 2 – on Friday – can’t wait

PPSS? - Very lovely electrician working where I work this week. So lovely that every time I tried to talk to him (which was a lot) I got tongue tied and just kept asking lame questions about fuse boxes....I’m such a loser. 

New Web Page

Hello all.

Just dropping by to let you all know that my new web page has launched. It can be found at www.cbarlow.co.uk.

i hope you are all well.

Take care
Chris xx

You can now follow me and share things with me on twitter! hurrah!!

Chrissyboyuk is my username!

thats a video of some of my art work if any body is interested.

anyhoooo, how is every body?

Things with me have been hectic.and odd and sad and happy and brilliant and lonely and confusing and exciting and disapointing.

the acting work has been quietin the last couple of months partly because of panto season, partly also because of xmas and new years. so hopefully things will take off again now.

HAPPY NEW YEAR to you all. Did you all have a wonderful time? mine was quiet but lovely. spent with friends.

so things with me are good. Love life? same as before.... unrequited. thats a year now.... my bloody hard is like an iron fist, it wont bloody let go.

I might have mensioned this before but i have lost weight. i used to be nearly 26 stone!!!! and sported a 56 inch waist. now i am a 42 inch waist. i dont know how much i weigh because i have refused to weigh myself for the who weightloss period. why? because i think weighing yourself is miss leading, and becomes obsessive and depressive. i just went with how i felt, how my cloths felt and ate reasonably. simple.

the upshot is i have had to spend the very very few pennies i have on some new cloths. because my entire waredrobe was too big for me. the good thing is i now have clothes i have always wanted to have and i look fab! lol - you know me its all waist coats, jackets, boots and trilby's.

i have been making arty stuff. here is some new things.





This is a Small OOAK fairy baby



gizmo and mohawk (i didn't sculpt these just built and painted them)



A Tiny OOAK baby fairy for use in a jar.



the fairy in the jar



a Raptor head



This is probably the hardest thing i have made. its a 1/24 scale T-rex. its pretty big. i built and sculpted and painted all myself.


more the the rex


so as you can see i have been a busy boy.

anyway how is everybody else???

Love and hugs
Chris xx

The wind in the Willows

Here are a few clips of me as toad from Blunderbus's 2006 production of the wind in the willows. this was done as a program test, better trailers for the show to follow.

More trouble for Jack!

Poor old Jack

He's having quite a time of it!

here he makes it to the train station





then he has to hide in a towel cupboard






then he suffers some sadness!






but he's ready for his journey tomorrow! little does he know that he's in for a rather large surprise!

Chris xx

Jack hears From Dawn!! at last!!

Poor old Jack... he has a tough time of it... and after waiting faithfully by the phone he finally hears officialy from Dawn. here is the episode:



i hope you like it. it was cleverly filmed. live. me in my room and they in an internet cafe in europe! it was such good fun and a big thank you to the creative team for letting me film with them.

Chris x